In this second and concluding part of the strategies to adopt in nurturing your dating relationship we would explore some of the things to avoid and those to actively be involved in to promote the growth of the dating relationship and your enjoyment of it. The saying, as you make your bed, so you lie on it, could have been made for the purpose of relationships, especially dating. Read on.
• Avoid nagging – Some of the synonyms of the word nag are annoy, worry, trouble, torment, irk, disturb, vex, bother, distress, pester, plague, harass, hassle. It is expected that one is asking how nagging would come into a dating relationship when the couples are not married. Relationships coaches have found out that many dating experiences have been marred by nagging. Even a marriage relationship, nagging is destructive. It does the same thing to dating or courtship relationships.
• Avoid premarital sex – Contrary to popular opinion, the introduction of sexual relationship at any stage of the dating relationship is not just inappropriate, it is counter-productive. Many dating partners have actually engaged in premarital sex believing that it would secure growth of the relationship. The opposite is usually the case. Premarital sex puts an automatic stop to the growth of the dating and courtship relationships.
• Listen – The dating period is a good time to learn to listen to your partner. Listening to your dating partner would help the relationship to flourish. When you are with your date, pay attention to him or her. Turn off the TV, the computer, the iPod or other devices unless the two of you are viewing them together. Face your partner and look straight into their eyes while they are talking. This would help you to connect emotionally and to detect when one is lying. Don’t jump to conclusions. Don’t try to solve all the problems. Sometimes, all we want is to be listened to.
• Develop the talking skill – Say what you want clearly. State if you need an answer or just want to be listened to. Ask more questions. Questions are the key here to develop the talking skill. Ask for clarification. Rephrase what your partner has said so you can be sure you have understood him or her.
• Be Grateful – Express gratitude to your partner for any acts of kindness including for the opportunity to experience his or her presence the last time you were out together or even for accepting to date you. A study has shown that expression of gratitude by partners has greatly enhanced the happiness of both men and women and helped to strengthen the relationship.
• Compliment your partner’s efforts to prepare for your meeting – Dating meetings are usually planned. In most cases, partners take time to prepare for it. For the ladies, they take the time to see that they are attractive, they fix their hair fine, manicure and pedicure and apply make-up. They look for matching dresses, shoes, hands and trinkets. The men also take time to see that they turn out in a way that the lady would be proud of them. These efforts should be complimented. This act would encourage the partners to better acts in future. The anticipation of it would make them keep their minds on the relationship. Everybody love to be given a pat on the back.
• Be fun to be with – Nobody likes a drag. Everybody love to have fun. You can help your dating relationship to grow towards your desired destination if you are fun to be with. You should be first a good listener, chatty, wear a happy face, smile and laugh at jokes as occasion demands. If you feel happy in your heart, you will exude happiness. If you cannot be happy during a dating meeting, then you should not even there at all.